Easy, Breezy, Beautiful Blogger Girl

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If Blogger had like a special digital magazine each month that featured a lucky blogger of the month on the 'cover' and had info about them with tips and tricks and such, I would hope that one day I could grace that cover with my cheesy smile and bright red hair. Wow, that was actually a really good idea. Too bad I'm not savvy enough to actually put that into motion. Maybe one day someone will and they'll give me partial credit for it.

That is what I'm pretending to do today since I had such a fun time filling out Erin's adorable Cosmo-Blogger quiz yesterday. I decided to do round one because I missed it and add some random tidbits that are currently going on in my life. I got real silly and into the spirit. Perhaps I should team up with Erin and make it a thing...




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>> Cheeseburgers gross me out. In fact, I can't have anything on my hamburger but lettuce. When I was little and McDonald's got my order wrong and put ketchup and pickles and all that nastyness on it my parents would tell me to scrap it off but really I would just give it to my sister or throw it away. I seriously won't eat it
>> The novelty on my car has worn off and now I can't stand it. Besides the fact that I have to actually get into the car along with my nanny kid to put him in his carseat because the seat does not align with the door, it  gets horrible gas mileage and I have to drive to Nashville every week
>> The vacuum cleaner is full of hedgie poo and I need to clean it out. Milo and Kol poop so much that I can't possibly fathom where it's coming from considering not that much goes into them
>> I put away 100 dollars a week to my savings for the future or rainy day mishaps. It baffles me that people can't manage to save 5 bucks here and there yet I can bulk up a shit ton by the summer. It's called will power people!
>> I've been doing my makeup almost every day and I'm really proud of myself for that. I'm normally not the girliest when it comes to things like that but I am trying super hard to act like a grown woman who has her shit together, or at least look like it
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I think that's enough for today. Hope you learned a little more about this girl Megan and decide you wanna dive into it for yourself. Make this weekend a blast and I promise you'll come back next week with daily writings again. Loves!
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Blogmopolitan Quiz

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I love that Erin took those awesome celebrity fill-in quizzes from Cosmo and turned them into little blogger "get-to-know-me's". Go fill it out cause it's super fun!

I haven't had time to blog this week, it's been extremely hectic with work and school. Instead of filling out that quiz on my only day off, I should be writing my damn essay for psych.Which funny enough, is about personality. I threw in my middle name for you guys :) The name I've always been in love with doesn't really suite me, but since I'm a book nerd I figured it could be my alternate identity. Little known fact- whenever I have to use personal information- like putting down your name for Starbucks or at a restaurant- I use this name. Hey, they don't know me! I would seriously love it if that was my future daughter's name. Let's see if I can get J on board.


Visit here if you wanna get the quiz and link up!



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Don't Shop When You're Angry

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You know how people say don't go grocery shopping when you're hungry? Well you should also stay away if you're pissed off/upset/depressed/etc because you will make some pretty bad decisions while in the supermarket.

I'm not gonna get into why I was so pissed off because I know better than to air my dirty laundry on the web, even though I really want to vent and wish this was a personal diary so I can just get everything off my chest, but I digress. If you're anything like me, you get really emotional when someone makes you angry. I don't just get mad, I get so overwhelmed and frustrated that I start crying and want to throw shit. I don't actually throw anything because then that means I just broke my own stuff and have to clean up, but I do start crying almost every time.

Well once you've cried in a Walmart with everyone staring at you, you have reached a point where you really just don't give a damn anymore. So this happened...


My shopping cart never looks like this. I was so out of it that I was like 'screw my diet. I hate everyone'. I just started throwing everything in there without hesitation. I'm not one of those people who eat their feelings when they're down. In fact, I'm the exact opposite- I have no appetite and can't eat. But for some reason last night my mind decided to go haywire and buy all the things! 

Well guess who also felt like a jackass 5 hours later when I realized I'm never going to eat this stuff. It's not just that I won't, I actually can't. Not only am I lactose-intolerant and can't eat that ice cream, but I haven't eaten junk food in such a long time my body can't even handle it at this point. 

I actually had to call Walmart and ask if I can even return food. Turns out I can, thank god. Oh but you bet I'm keepin those muffins cause banana nut is delicious. But everything else is going. Let this be a lesson next time you're thinking about going to the store. Don't waste your money on food you will never eat because of temporary feelings. No bueno.


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Deployment Countdown

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Happy Hump Day!
Mine is actually quite happy since I'm off. Yay me! Except I gotta fill it with a shit ton of errands. Is there ever such a thing as a relaxing day off? Gotta send the boy his birthday package, so stay tuned for that! Speaking of the boy, I ordered a custom calendar to represent the time we have left until he comes back, it came in awhile ago but me being lazy- I'm barely getting to it now.





I completely love this thing. I was perusing the interwebz [mostly Pinterest] for something to have to show the days pass by until my husband is back in my arms. I kept coming across number blocks and jars filled with marbles that you put into a different jar or "kisses from daddy" that you eat each night. Basically a way to empty something as each day passes. I didn't want that. I wanted something I could cross off and actually see that days were done. I didn't want a regular calendar because then I'd have to flip pages and I wanted his entire deployment in front of me. Bottom line is I wanted a giant piece of paper as big as my fridge- which is what I got.

August 2nd is our anniversary in case you were wondering. And the heart in between September and October is the time frame in which he will be back- hopefully. I had posted this on Facebook and a bunch of my friends were confused as to all the writing and lines and circles around the numbers. Facepalm. Because there aren't little boxes for each day, different things still need to be represented. Weekends are in bold, the day is underneath and if it's a holiday it's on top. The most important thing to me is the red X that gets to be placed on each number every night. It makes me happy seeing that this month is almost done and J is that much closer to being home.

Can we just fast forward this year already?



*Update* 09/22/15
This post has gotten a lot of traffic due to Pinterest ladies going berserk. I didn't create the calendar myself, but if you want one click here. All I did was remove the bubble wrap so I could scribble on it. Hope this helps!

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My Valentines

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Hello all.

Some of you may still be in jammies or asleep since today is Presidents Day, but my butt was up and at em cause work don't stop for this girl. So how did your V-day pan out? Was it full of mushy goodness? I certainly hope so! Somebody better be gettin some lovin since I'm not.

Mine wasn't horrible, it's that the day itself sucked ass. I seriously wasn't mad because J is gone, I'm not bitter like that. I was extremely frustrated because my town is full of military morons who can't drive. I shall explain. These people count on their paychecks like nobody's business. I know everyone does, but these people take it to a whole new level. Like, don't even think about going to the commissary once everyone has gotten paid.

Well, my town just happens to think it's a great idea to put everything on one single street. Seriously. There is only one of everything and it is all on one friggin street off the freeway. Since this weekend is a holiday in itself, guess who all get paid? So lemme wrap everything up: it was Valentine's Day- on a Friday, that just so happened to be payday, landing on a 3-day weekend, and it was POURING. It took me an hour to go to the bank and I live down the street. Not even kidding. 

Before I headed out I figured I was not going to let shitty weather and a missing husband get me down. This girl got a little prettied up! I even did my hair- GASP! But I realize I don't own a shred of pink, at all. And I wasn't gonna wear red considering, you know, my hair. I was still cute, though!


I know it may seem like I'm having a super conceited moment, but remember my man is deployed. So feast your eyes, bebeh! Isn't my umbrella so effing adorable?! God I love Betsey Johnson. I bought it because it goes over your body which is nice cause now my purse will finally stay dry. Plus I felt like a pimp walking around with it in stores. Get it!

So everyone posting all their goodies and treats on Facebook made me crave chocolatey fruit sooooooo bad. I herp derped hard core though cause once again I forgot it was V-day and actually tried to step foot into an Edible Arrangements. Bad idea. I felt worse for the women of the world though. It was 6 in the evening when I ventured into that store, and you should have seen it packed full of dudes trying to get their sweetie something last minute. Way ta go, guys. Of course everything was gone and I was sad. Oh well. So I got Mexican food to go and spent the rest of Love Day with my two cutie pies.


You are so jealous of my Malibu rum in my Peter Pan mug. You know you are. And the fact that you don't have prickly adorableness to keep you company. Well come over and we'll have a sleepover! I'll get the chips and salsa ready...



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Valentine's Day Care Package

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Happy Valentine's Day Lovies!
Don't feel bad for me on this love-filled day just because J is gone- we've actually only spent one Valentine's Day together so it's really no biggie. In fact, two years ago for V-day I got a ticket on my way to get back on birth control because J was coming home from Afghanistan 4 days later. Romantic stuff right there.
Past ramblings on Love Day
Love day recap
Love day surprises
Let's get to the point of this post- sending cute care packages to my hot-stuff husband overseas. Last deployment I sent him a care package every 2 weeks which was exhausting to me and my bank account. This time around I decided to only do them once a month and because of this I will make them more special by giving each one a specific theme. It'll be a good way to keep my mind off things and focusing on creating/finding items and hopefully he'll really enjoy everything when it arrives each month. February the punk is lucky because there is Valentine's Day in the first half of the month and his birthday the second half, so he gets two.
I picked up materials to decorate the box and hunted down any adorable thing I saw in the all-red aisles of Walmart and Target. I'm pretty sure I was way more excited to purchase all the goodies than he was to receive them, especially since he is legitimately trying to eat healthy and get back into shape and all I did was send him a shit ton of chocolate. But everything I got had a specific purpose! I swear! ;)

The Supplies

The Lovey Goods

Red Necesseties

Decorated Box

Wrapped Awesomeness

Finished Product

The Card

I put so much effort into that damn box. I tried to stay away from pink as much as possible in case he opened this in front of his work buddies, but some of that stuff was just too adorable to pass up. I included his fav chocolate Reese's, inside meaningfulness with the owls and Ninja Turtles, and I found a friggin red stuffed hedgehog! It was meant to be. As for the rest I wanted to include things he might need but stick to the love theme and went with red. I know I didn't have to wrap everything but I wanted him to feel special and have things to open. Did I over-do it? I honestly don't think so haha

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So you wanna hear something super adorable that would only happen to us? The day after J left and I was miserable and whatnot, I started perusing Etsy to take my mind off things and get him presents. I came across this woman who created cards and knick-knacks using cute little woodland creatures- including hedgies. She made a woman's tee and kid's tee adorning the most adorable quilled furball and I knew I just had to have it, but first I asked if she could make it in a men's tee for J and I would just get one for me later. 

February 7th was the real Valentine's Day for the two of us considering both our gifts to each other arrived that day. Neither one of us told the other we got them anything, which made it that much sweeter. He of course loved his box and ate most of his candy in seconds. I cried at mine, both out of happiness and sadness. Wanna know what he got for me? The hedgehog shirt. THE ONE I GOT FOR HIM. I love how we didn't just get each other something similar-, we literally got each other the exact same shirt. Only us

I teared up because not only was his card the cutest most adorablest thing ever [that's a word, people], he knows me so well that he happened across the exact shirt I wanted but couldn't bring it in me to buy it for myself because I wanted him to have it. I even customized his so he didn't have any pink on it. But I was also sad because that technically means he's already seen his shirt, therefore ruining the surprise. I immediately emailed the shop owner telling her the crazy story that just happened and she told me once he told her he wanted to send me a card and talked about Milo and Kol [I had already told her about them] she knew exactly who he was and couldn't believe it. It apparently took everything in her not to spoil the surprise!


Back of the card:
"I love you more than Kol loves running
and Milo loves mealies.
Happy Valentine's Day, Baby"


I of course could not keep this in, no matter how much I still wanted his to be a surprise, and told him I loved him for reading my mind. What a day of love it was! Hope yours is just as special!


Drunk In Love by Beyoncé Feat. Jay-Z on Grooveshark


Mwah!



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Linking up with Whit and Sarah

I Love Me

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While everyone else [mainly sappy women] is being all miserable about Valentine's Day tomorrow, I'd like to remind all you bitches that if you don't love yourself first and are happy and confident, what makes you think you're gonna land a man with that attitude? Also, my husband is deployed. Suck it up.

With that being said, I love me lots and lots and thought I deserved a little somethin somethin. Strawberries are my favorite fruit of all time and lately I've been craving some smothered in chocolate. It's a combination of eating healthy the past two months and being on my effing period for the past two weeks [hey Aunt Flo, be a dear and get the fuck out] which equaled to me seriously not being able to let go of said delicious treats. 

Well Megan is super cheap and doesn't feel like shelling out 70 bucks for some berries- you ruthless shop owners!- so I started perusing the interwebz to find me some yummy in my tummy. Edible arrangements proved to be a bust- 16 bucks for 6 strawberries? Go step on a lego. Then I remembered how much Groupon has been my best friend and happened across some Shari's Berries coupons to get me my fill before the craze of Vday hit.

Yesterday they arrived and I practically knocked down the UPS guy to get to them. I apologized for my hormones and ran my freezing ass back inside the house to devour my chocolatey goodness.


Obviously they do not look as tasty as the picture because when do they friggin ever, but they were every bit of heaven in my mouth as I imagined them to be. I'm not ashamed to say that I finished them by the end of the night. At least I had the self control not to swallow them all whole in a matter of minutes. Don't get me wrong, that thought crossed my mind but I wanted them to last as long as I possibly could.

The Groupon ends tomorrow so I'd hightail it on over to their site and purchase this baby before the opportunity is gone. I'd rather pay 15 bucks for a dozen than selling one of my kidneys. True story.
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Greedy Assholes

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Happy Hump day everyone.

Except for me it isn't quite so happy. Once again I had something else planned for today but because I blog in real time instead of doing it the night before or even days ahead, I'm going to rant/vent about what literally just happened to me about 8 minutes ago.

I hate eBay. People suck and they're friggin douchebag assholes. Since J is gone I've had a crazy amount of ideas for care packages to send him and wanted to get a head start on buying everything. I won't say what everything is because they're all themed and I don't wanna spoil the surprise, but I've been doing a lot of Etsy shopping.

I got the brilliant idea to get some cheap stuff on eBay to complete some of the packages and found 3 options that would all suffice. Usually when I shop on eBay I only purchase the things you can pay for right now in full. I usually don't give a shit because I hate competing with people on stuff I know I want.

Well it just so happens that ALL THREE of the things I want have to be bid on. Great. I hate people in general, but people on here are ruthless. I lost at all 3 things. All 3 of them. I feel like a failure to J, but most of all I just want to punch these people. I wanted there to be a chat box so I can say "I'm purchasing these for my deployed husband- go the fuck away!" What's worse is I was outbid in the last 12 seconds. TWELVE FUCKING SECONDS AND THAT SHIT WOULD HAVE BEEN MINE!


So to everyone right now I say-
Suck my balls.


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Snowed In

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One of the best things about being a nanny is that your job can come to you. Knowing that I don't have to leave me house or get dressed and still get paid is a pretty awesome feeling. But the reason behind it kinda sucked.

On Saturday morning I awoke kinda bummed that I had to work the weekend. It was the first one in 2 years and I had gotten used to Saturdays and Sundays being 'us' time, or now, 'me' time. Well Mother Nature also had a trick up her sleeve. She decided that me having to work on Saturday wasn't enough, she had to make me miserable and stranded as well.

I usually look out my bedroom window in the morning to see what I'm dealing with, but I was extra groggy and just wanted to get out the door before I decided that my bed was a way better option. I received a text from my boss saying to take my time and be extra careful. Umm, why? I opened the front door and was bitch slapped in the face by the cold truth. 


Son of a bitch. 

Mother Nature is an asshole. I had already delt with freezing rain and ice two days prior and barely made it out alive. I was not going to survive this. My car isn't the greatest at handling slippery roads. Once the car detects that the front wheels are spinning it goes into awd mode. So basically my car tries to get me out of trouble after it gets me into trouble. Rude. So I knew I was not going to venture out into this storm that was suppose to last all day. Am I a baby? No. I know this doesn't compare to what people are experiencing all over the country. But I've never personally driven in snow, the back roads out here are terrible, and my car is a douche. That's 3 strikes against me.

And what sucks major donkey balls is I wouldn't have even woken up to this or given a shit if I did because I usually don't work fucking Saturday! So nobody else cared because they didn't have to work or go to school. Lucky bastards asleep in their cozy beds while I'm over here having a major panic attack! Luckily my boss is super chill and from Chicago, so she brought the little nugget to me.


He moved in is more like it. There are 4 additional bags on that chair. That's a lot of shit. Kid is more decked out than I am. I'm just glad someone enjoyed my 70 inch tv since the person who wanted it in the first place won't even be here to watch it for the next 9 months. Dick.

At first I was extremely nervous to have him in my house. Not because I was worried he would mess with my stuff, but because my house is not child proof in the slightest. I have a glass kitchen table, 2 glass end tables, a giant tv that could fall on him, a glass entertainment center, and tons of cupboards he can easily get into. Shit, I just realized how much glass I own. Anyway, it was basically either possibly kill myself trying to get to him, or possibly have him injured and/or poisoned in my home. Not the greatest this or that situation.

I chose the latter for obvious reasons, J even confirmed it. Yep, I emailed him the first picture asking 'can I drive in this?' His response? 'You- no. I could easily handle it in that car but you wouldn't know what to do if shit hit the fan.' Thanks babe. Well, what can I say- the man knows me.

So the baby boy and I had a fun filled day of running around the house and going up and down the stairs multiple times. Went better than expected and nobody died of ingesting toilet cleaner. Win.



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Mother Nature is on Her Period

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Either that, or she's going through some serious menopause. 

I had another post planned for today, but when I woke up this morning and looked out my window I became very discouraged. If it wasn't for my new nanny kid obviously, I would not have ventured outside into the asshole that is Tennessee. I'm so tired of this shitty weather, it's enough to make you barf hot cocoa. Every time that I think 'I don't remember it being this cold and shitty this time last year' I have to remind myself that we're in this damn polar vortex and it may never friggin end.

You know when it's hot outside people usually say it's hotter than a devil's asshole? No? Just my neck of the woods? Well at the current moment it's colder than a snowman's testicles. For serious. I haven't turned my heater off in almost two weeks. Before you say I'm crazy and will blow out my electric bill, it's already happened and I literally can't turn it off. If you failed to remember my adorable children, Milo and Kol cannot be in temperatures below 73 degrees or they could die. So all this 10 and below bullshit is getting real old because I would very much like my babies to survive winter and not have to be wrapped up in an electric blanket every time I take them out of their cage.


This is what I had the pleasure of waking up to. Having to yank at my car door to get it to open so I could spend the next 30 minutes thawing the rest of it is seriously my kind of morning, people. I just love having to do the same to my trash can so it can actually get picked up today. That is if the garbage people even come by. I'm not trying to compare what we have to the anyone up north getting dozens of feet of snow. That's not why I'm complaining, I've been in that snow and it sucks major balls too.

You see the ground? That's a sheet of ice. Apparently down south we get to enjoy icy covered roads and freezing rain that's more like tiny ice cubes hitting your windshield. Going anywhere is a big gamble due to sliding all over the streets and majority of them being narrow and windee [I didn't want it to look like windy lol]. But seriously, the whole town shuts down including the base because no one can get around. I'm surprised the schools weren't closed today considering they were Monday yet that wasn't nearly as bad as today. AND NO ONE KNOWS HOW TO DRIVE. Which makes it so much worse. 

I'm not even going home tonight. I have to be back early in the morning anyway and it's just not worth it. I'd rather be stuck here and knowing I can still watch the baby instead of possibly crashing my car in the dead of night or not being able to leave my driveway. So Mickey Mouse Clubhouse marathon it is I guess. Be safe guys!




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Stepping Up My Game

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Hello again, I'm back. Surprised?

Yep, two days in a row people. Kinda proud of myself. Anyway, I realized yesterday after my little rant of how much I suck that in the midst of being a mopey moperton, I totally passed up my anniversary of this white space of mine. Run-on sentence much? Maybe... I managed to overlook that a couple days ago I have now been blogging for a year.

But does it really count when you don't blog regularly? For the first 8 months I was on a freakin roll. I blogged 5 days a week because I genuinely liked it. Then after getting to know the community and everything involved- all the damn link ups, sponsors, reviews, etc- I grew tired of it. I didn't want to become a sell out and join another's giveaway just to get more followers. I did it once because I figured it was for her 1 year anniversary and it was a happy, worth while occasion. I quickly realized that although I gained about 70 followers from it, they obviously didn't give a shit about me or what I had to say. I'd rather have readers, and hardly anyone was actually doing any reading.

My writing went from every day, to every other day, to once or twice a week, and then eventually about 3 times a month. I figured if nobody else cared, why should I? I'm never going to be that person that just comments in hopes of you hopping onto my blog and following back. I don't even follow every blog I comment on. I barely comment- only if I feel the post was crazy awesome or my comment was necessary. But it doesn't mean I don't read. If I legitimately love a blog enough to follow it, I read damn near every post.

And I'll be the first to admit that if you start clogging your blog with unnecessary shit- like one too many reviews, nothing but sponsor posts and giveaways- I'm going to stop following you. I want content, damnit. No, I'm not the pot calling the kettle black because I am completely aware of how little I've been blogging in recent months. Because whenever I do post something, it's from the heart. It's my actual thoughts and emotions that go into my writing. That's how it should be.

I'll also be the first one to admit I'm lazy as fuck. Notice there aren't any photos or crazy gifs in this post? Well yeah, I'm being serious. And I don't wanna put in the effort. For reals, sometimes I just honestly don't wanna do it. I have like 50 ideas written down of things to post about- some of them I've had since July- and I've never had the extra push to actually start typing.

Back to the point- I know I've been slacking. Life sucks and hits you at the shittiest of times. Add that to a major life change- like your husband leaving for majority of the year in a dangerous place- and it's enough to put you in a mini depression. And I realized that this is where I can put all those thoughts and feelings. That's the whole reason I started this blog, and I need to get back to my roots. Whether or not anyone is actually reading those thoughts is not important. If you want to, read. If not, I really don't mind. You won't hurt my feelings because in the end I'm still going to be here. 

So I pledge to do better. To start writing again and put myself back out there. Join me?



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Love is...Waiting

3 comments


Today marks 1 month that J has been gone. It's been a rough one, and even though I don't have to, I find myself needing to apologize for my absence the entire month. I literally did not know what to do with myself the majority of the time.

The day he left I didn't want to go home to an empty house. When I finally had to go home, I didn't want to go to sleep in an empty bed. True, we've been apart for training or traveling, but this was different. I knew he wasn't coming back any time soon. I couldn't sleep for shit. I stayed on the couch watching tv until my body was forced to drift to sleep. That way when I woke up in a haze in my living room I really wouldn't know what was going on and would end up in my bed. 

It was like that for awhile. That Monday was supposed to be my first day back to class, and I just couldn't do it. When you randomly burst into tears for no reason and are pathetic enough to wear your husband's dirty shirt because it still smells like him, you really shouldn't be among people. So I emailed my professor and explained what was going on. Instead I ventured out into the cold [bad idea] and went to Walgreens to stock up on junk food, candy, soda, and everything else I usually don't eat. I downloaded practically every Disney movie, and old school Disney Channel Original movie [I'm talkin to you Brink! and Alley Cats Strike] and had myself a little kid movie marathon in my living room.

It went on like that for days, literally living off beef jerky, sunflower seeds and cashews. My poor body... Eventually not being able to sleep in my bed turned into not being able to sleep at all, as in becoming nocturnal. I would end up crashing around 4 or 5 in the morning and sleeping until noon or later. Things turned ugly. Days were blurring together and I was starting to become a shut in. Every now and then I went to a friend's house but it just wasn't the same. 

Somewhere around the 25th I knew this couldn't continue. I allowed myself to be the mopey loser wife for far too long but that phase was about to end. I needed to suck it up if I was going to make it during this entire deployment. I used to be such an independent person, and granted yes, being used to your significant other sleeping next to you every night and seeing them every day kinda cancels that out, but this was the perfect opportunity for me to get back in touch with myself. Once he began to email me and soon after, skyping me, I was much better and knew that it was time to get back on my feet.

I found a new family to nanny for and started yesterday, I'm back in school, and I'm committed to getting into shape. All these things should not only take my mind off things, but hopefully make time go by a little faster. I know some days will be tough, but I will never go back to how I was at the beginning of the month. I simply can't. It's not healthy and no person should live that way.

So, 1 month down- another 8 to go. I can do this.


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