Pokemon Care Package

Happy Friday!
In all honesty I had every intention of posting all week long. But those pesky wisdom teeth gaps in my mouth continued to cause me agonizing pain and if I could barely get out of bed there was simply no way in hell my fingers were going to cooperate and churn out words for you lovelies. I was lucky if my brain decided to churn words out of my mouth. Lord knows it sucked to even laugh. Why the hell are they called wisdom teeth anyway? If they were so smart they'd know not to show up in a place they are unwanted and kindly get the fuck out on their own. But I digress.
The morning I got my smarty-pants teeth taken out I also decided [in a very drugged out state] that it was the perfect day to send the awesome care package I had made J forever ago but was too lazy to actually go to the post office and ship. So obviously I made my friend do it since I had my own personal chauffeur for the day. It was pretty sweet. I was calling her Biddermen and everything. Like when Brian drove Peter in his job-taxi. She even bought me jello and other treats. Such a good day.
Anyway, I usually send out my boxes by the tenth of the month so he receives them somewhere around the middle and has something to look forward to. I hadn't seen him in weeks and I was really starting to miss his face. It threw my whole mindset off and I didn't function properly there for awhile. One day I looked up at my [bad ass] fridge calendar and was like shit. The month is almost over. I gotta get back on my game. So I churned this sucker out and although it didn't require as much effort as my Ninja turtles one I was much more satisfied with it. Because duh who didn't play pokemon when they were like 8. Nostalgia, baby.

Pokemon related items:
PS Vita
Squirtle decal
Squirtle mini poster
Pokemon starter mouse pad
Squirtle dog tags
Squirtle evolution shirt
Gym master workout tank
Cute little postcard

If you couldn't tell, Squirtle is his favorite pokemon and if he could have any pet he would choose to have his own personal Squirtle at his disposal to do his biddings and play beer pong with. On Tuesday while I was at Target buying things I certainly do not need, he emailed me saying he took a quiz to find out which Starter Pokemon he was and he got Squirtle without trying. Technically it said 'you bet your ass I got Squirtle on the first try'. I know that because I just checked it. I quickly received a follow-up email saying 'and like 20 minutes later after taking that survey and discovering that I am in fact a Squirtle... your care package arrives'.

So of course I went home and took said quiz and I too got Squirtle, which I was not expecting. And that folks is how you know you and your spouse were meant to be. When even in an alternate, fictional universe you two would still be together, fucking shit up. Yeh. Take said quiz here and tell me who you get.

Past boxes:

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Rawr! I am the Gauze Monster!

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I got my wisdom teeth pulled yesterday, grr. But besides all the horror stories everybody told me about how it would be and what I would be going through afterwards, I felt completely fine. In fact I probably talked more in that day than I have all week combined. Go figure. Everything was going pretty good until 10 pm last day. I awoke from a power nap from pain meds and promptly ran to the bathroom and threw up. Damn this tiny body and it requiring a shit ton of sustenance in order to tolerate pain medication. 

So I did what anybody would do after unhinging my tiny jaw and letting loose all the yogurt and jello I ingested during the day- I downed a shit ton of cookies n cream ice cream and called it a night. I mean, even though I'm not even allowed to spit or rinse vigorously for another 6 days, pretty sure the damage has been done after throwing up. It's kinda sweet actually. I don't have to work today and I don't have to talk to people. It's like the perfect excuse for not giving a shit.

I'll be getting back to your regularly scheduled programming shortly. My boss had her baby last month, hence me not having the time to blog. How bout that- it's literally been a month. My last blog post was the 15th and Little Man was born the 16th. Actually he was evacuated from the premises due to a C-section. But I digress. See you tomorrow, or next week. Remember I have the perfect excuse. Later.

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